We’re back from Europe, and now my pooping schedule is off. I’ve been pondering this pretty obsessively, and I’ve come up with two possible reasons for the problem. First, considering that Budapest is nine hours ahead of Seattle, my bowels may be under the false impression that it is now 6pm, not 9am. Alternatively, my stomach [...]
There are BONES scattered throughout the city
In weeds, in bushes, in very shallow graves.
Birds? Squirrels? HUMANS? Oh, what a pity!
Perhaps they’re children who didn’t behave.
The killer must believe he’s hidden them well,
And he has! Thousands of people walk by,
But none see. At murder, this guy excels.
Drop a rib bone here, big toe there. How [...]
Perfect. That’s what I thought after finally navigating through the McMansion outskirts and arriving in downtown Bend, Oregon. Too perfect. So perfect, it’s creepy. As pleasant as the downtown area is in late June, I can’t help having the feeling that I’m Jim Carey in “The Truman Show.” Something’s weird about this place.
The “Bite of [...]
For most of my married life, I was opposed to owning a dog for two main reasons.
First, I’m pretty meticulous about cleanliness. I feel like I’ve had my hands full with a wife whose bags and drawers vomit clothing, ungraded essays, stained coffee cups, and unopened packages of eyeliner from Walgreen’s all over the bedroom, [...]